The Necessary Power of Forgiveness

*** Disclaimer *** I do not mean to say that what you may have been through (or are currently going through) was not truly awful. Forgiveness does not mean allowing others to do the same thing towards you (or even others) again. No one deserves abuse. If you are being triggered by the words of this article, or are unable to get out of an individually or systemically abusive situation at this time, please stop reading as it may not be helpful for this stage in your recovery from traumatic/abusive circumstances. Your journey is hard, but please know that you are loved. ***

It doesn’t take a lot to be able to see that the world is changing rapidly. Ideologies and perspectives appear to be as organic as the plant growing in your sunroom. If you have been paying attention to the changing political atmosphere and global climate, it is easy to see a great awakening taking place in the hearts of us all. What had the potential to cause divide and used as a vehicle for hate has instead been a catalyst for powerful expansion in the connectedness of our souls. We can connect with each other so easily now and what we find is a growing movement of love and support much more powerful than the subversive and individualised messages of hate. Now more than ever before the contents of the collective heart matters as we move into a kind of adolescence of humanity on our evolutionary journey.

I recently had a conversation with a relative about the frustrations they were having with a particular organised institution (or subset of such), and it made me review what my own views were on the subject. How did I handle growing up in such an institution when I could feel the active suppression of my heart within? It is certainly the case that many people are NOT feeling the love or support from these ageing institutions. They seem more bent on control than they are on expanding the heart-space. People are leaving in droves (and rightly so in my own opinion) when they become disillusioned. Instead, we turn within and we turn to love for answers.

How then should we relate to these institutions or indeed to anyone that seems like they were put on our path to suppress us? If the aim of the game is heart expansion, I propose that love and forgiveness are the key. I would go one step further in saying that forgiveness of those that would control you is necessary for furthering of your own personal purpose on this earth. But WHY is it so necessary and HOW on earth can we forgive?

The answer to both questions lies in your perception. In feeling our interconnectedness, one thing becomes more and more certain; we are ALL the universe. We are One. You individually are the intelligence of the universe crystalised into human form. As the universe, you took this role in this lifetime to explore, experience, and have your own unique journey. Before we incarnated into this material plane and into these vessels, we were known to the universe and to each other. We decided as the universe that we wanted to experience the infinite everything. As such, we all have certain roles to play in the expansion of this knowledge. The lesson that I was put on the earth to learn is my own, and yours is your own.

True desire and satisfaction are signposts that you are on the way to fulfilling your dharma (your divine purpose, what you were meant to be in this lifetime according to pre-incarnation contracts). If you feel satisfaction when your heart-space expands (read – as you experience compassion for others), or in transformational change, this is a sign that you were meant to spiritually awaken in this lifetime. The control others have over us and our actions blocks our ability to experience all we have the potential to experience. When we physically exit these institutions (often with great backlash and taking great courage and for that I applaud you), we leave the physical form of control. This is only one part of control. The other is of traumatic psychological patterns, and spiritual karmic ties. The lesson in leaving is not complete only in the physical. Forgiveness truly frees us from the control of others because it means the start of taking responsibility for your own thoughts and feelings. It is the first step on taking away that mental, emotional and spiritual control, the hold that old situations and beings may have over you. To awaken and then grow to your full potential this lifetime, autonomy and true freedom in thoughts and feelings, as well as actions, is necessary.

Forgiveness does not happen overnight. It is a pattern of thought behaviour that must be repeated every time a thought trigger takes place. The following are some of the more helpful thought responses to those triggers that I have found so far;

1. We are all One at our core. ALL of us have the “I Am” inside. This means that when I am yelling at you, I am really yelling at myself – which is futile. It also means that their joy is my joy at the very core of things. To wish unhappiness on them, consciously or unconsciously, is to wish unhappiness on myself.

“Nonreaction is not weakness but strength. Another word for nonreaction is forgiveness. To forgive is to overlook, or rather to look through. You look through the ego to the sanity that is in every human being as his or her essence.” - Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose

2. We decided on this path together. Before time began, we all agreed, in love, on this course of action. We chose our roles and lessons and who we would interact with in advance.

3. My purpose is to spiritually awaken this lifetime, which means I have the blessing of being conscious of the gifts of the universe for the rest of my days. The person who is triggering me (or those who are part of institutions that seek to control) agreed to be put on this earth with the purpose of being a catalyst for change, and for that we should thank them.

4. When I have less anger, blame, and spirals of shame in my mind and heart, I have more space for the expansive love of the universe and true peace.

5. The unawakened are like toddlers. They are behaving (unconsciously) in line with predetermined behavioural patterns. As you would forgive a toddler for their thoughtless bad actions, so too should you forgive unawakened souls.

Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

- Luke 23:34

A little while ago, I came out of a thought trigger pattern of my own. I now realise in retrospect that it was a very old karmic tie, most likely played out over many, many lifetimes based on a lesson of co-dependency I needed to learn. I had a dream where I hung the phone up on a particular character in my own story after saying a final goodbye, then felt the knowledge that they could never reach me again as the contract had finished. Later, I had another dream – aliens trying to take over the “great school of life” on earth. They were looking for everyone, however I was invisible and try as they might they could not find me. I woke up the next morning and one sentence came out immediately in my auto-writing practice.

I am free.

Since that time, thoughts of that character have not triggered me into emotional pain. I feel peace that I had not felt in a long time and can easily recognise changes in my emotional state. I have been operating in pain and trauma cycles for a very long time and have now seen through my own shadow-work the destruction they caused in my life. With that in mind, I wish ardently now for you this very same peace I hold in my heart.

Sending you all my love

Lunette x